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Aquarius in Love

Aquarius in Love, Venus in Aquarius love style

Updated April 9, 2020
Originally posted December 20, 2011
By Corinne Lane     43 Comments

“I Love Shocking You”

The first secret to know about an Aquarius in love is simply that it does NOT refer to a sun-sign Aquarius person. Only someone with the planet Venus in Aquarius will be an “Aquarius in love.” Find out your Venus sign.

The person with Venus in Aquarius in an extremely special, unconventional, and rebellious lover. Venus in air is always a bit detached and impersonal, but here it is not as detached as in Gemini. This lover expresses love freely and flirtatiously and can stick around longer than a Gemini. You’ll know when Aquarius loves you because he sees no point in hiding it. You’ll be highly drawn to him because he excites you, he unsettles you. If you don’t watch yourself, he’ll have you half-naked in his arms where you least expect it, like at a bus-stop. But he’s not simply about the sex, he wants to read to you, study you, talk to you, and really get to know you. He is a bit of a psychologist.

You have probably heard that Venus in Aquarius values freedom in relationships. But freedom is more of a Sagittarian value. To Venus in Aquarius, shock value is more important than freedom. Venus in Aquarius will get into a tight relationship if it offers some shock value, if it upsets the status quo. They are progressive and innovative, above all. It’s not merely about freedom; they need to be extreme!

If you have Venus in Aquarius, you’re not necessarily craving the craziest lover, just the one who’s most different. For example, if your society is full of wild party animal types, then you’ll be attracted to the only homely, shy person. If you were raised a Southern Baptist, the bisexual/foreigner/atheist is the only one for you. You experience love best and most freely when you are going against the grain in your society. You refuse to fit into the mold of what is expected from you in regard to love relationships.

The goal with Venus in Aquarius is to overthrow the norms that inhibit the flow of true love. You have a real chance of experiencing the heights of true love because you simply ignore the boring rules and tread on without inhibitions. You pave the way for the evolution of our love natures. If our world is ever to grow in our definition of love, it will be due to the ideas, experiments, and crazy one-night-stands of Venus in Aquarius. It’s a lucky person who captures Venus in Aquarius; and yes, Venus in Sagittarius is highly compatible with Venus in Aquarius.

You are not Pisces-type martyrs, but you are martyrs in your own way. You sacrifice a “good” reputation for the sake of forcing the world to consider new ways of loving each other. You experiment with partners and relationships. The bad news is that all this scientific experimenting with love can leave you with an impersonal attitude toward your lover, which can interfere with close relationships. You can come across as cold and uncaring.

The Venus in Aquarius woman stands out by dressing differently or wearing her hair differently. She’s never boring. She’s unconventional.

Men with Venus in Aquarius are romantically turned on by unique people, by the strange ones, by the eccentric ones. They don’t mind quirky people; they are attracted to them.

Both Ashton Kutcher and Bruce Willis have Venus in Aquarius, as do Elton John, Paris Hilton, Taylor Swift, Quentin Tarantino, Axl Rose, Chris Rock, and Mitt Romney.

How to Love Venus in Aquarius

To make your Aquarius lover feel loved, you must first remember that they are an air love sign. This means that they are operating neither on the emotional, nor the physical wave. Their love language is abstract, in the mind, and understood rather than felt. Talking about all subjects is more romantic for them than deep emotional promises and hugs. If you have Venus in Water, perhaps you should move on now before you get hurt.

They enjoy discussing things, including fantasies. Try this: get an adult novel and take turns reading it to each other and acting out the scenes. They’ll enjoy it more if it’s outdoors.

They are not content to sit at home with you, just the two of you. In order to experience love, they need to socialize actively with many people. Be prepared for this. Remember, they need to be shocking someone with your relationship. Plan for this.

They are geeks at heart, so plan trips to the library, science museums, art exhibits, or any place that gives you the chance to discuss something. As gifts, buy them only the newest, most advanced technological gadgets. Never get them an older version of anything.

The single-most important secret to win over an Aquarius lover is to be different from everyone he/she knows. Not just a little different; you must have some shock value. Dye your hair green if you have to. If everyone in your circle is Muslim, be Jewish, or vice versa. If everyone is a vegetarian, have a burger. If everyone is an alcoholic, be the only sober one. You get the picture. Let them know that you appreciate their uniqueness. Never say that you think they’re boring or normal.

In the end, your Aquarius lover may have to move on, but they will leave you standing in awe of them rather than broken-hearted. You will have been graced with a micro-step towards evolution, and you will never be the same again.

Note: Your Venus sign shows your characteristics in close relationships, not necessarily in any other area of your life. Conjunctions to Venus from the outer planets will alter your love style.

Read more about Venus in Aquarius. Read about the Air Sign Love Language since Aquarius is an air sign. Be sure to try the free compatibility report.

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43 comments

  1. I do not know astrology–but the most important thing for me (Venus in Aquarius) is not to be biased and yet at the same time go on your own path. It does not mean you are more arrogant and it does not imply that traditions are negative or bad: they become destructive when people copy and paste life with an biased, unfair and subjective BS.

    And love is no different. I am passionate deeply and have intesnity but those come second to the truth–to respect, and diginty and conscience for my right as well as other peoples’ rights.

    The person who I will never associate with is A) Biased person B) has no concience and no respect for other peoples’ rights and C) is a liar and manipulative (hidde motivations) and D) someone who cannot logically understand their emotions–be passionate, and romantic, and have intenstiy, but be able to understand thy self as well as other people.

    Advice: Do not be arrogant, do not be biased, do not overstepp other peoples’ rights, and do not be manipulative.If you have these things, Venus in Aquarius, or infact most people, do not want to associate with you. Most importatnly, Do not gossip behind our backs. Never will we come to terms with someone who is a “friend” and yet gossips behind my back.

  2. “For example, if your society is full of wild party animal types, then you’ll be attracted to the only homely, shy person….The single-most important secret to win over an Aquarius lover is to be different from everyone he/she knows…”
    This is sooo accurate. I could be very attracted to someone who is “among the crowd” and never even THINK about being with them. I can’t stand “what everyone else does” as a part of my life as far as how superficial and closed minded the world can be in its views.
    On the other hand I am a sun in Pisces/moon in Leo so I actually do enjoy the sitting at home and enjoying one on one time and can appreciate fierce loyalty. The kick with me is that even though I am very emotional at times, I can quickly rationalize my emotions once I pull myself together. I can realize that although I appreciate attention, I don’t need THAT much of it. In fact it annoys me to a certain extent after a while.
    I just feel like there are so many things to see and learn and experience besides worrying about someone all day long.
    My two cents anyway. Lol.

    • bob watts on said:

      I have had a very deep experience of love with my aquarius wamen once lover’s then friends and trying to become lovers again I can’t tell you the ride she took me on in from a 5 year relationship to a 3 month roller coaster ride very iinteresting, intense but through it all 1 I don’t ever want to experience that again but on the other hand I wouldn’t trade her for the world. I love her and very in love with her a Scorpio man.

    • WE SHARE THE EXACT SAME ZODIAC TRAITS wow . Haha!! I thought the same about the pisces leo home staying and fierce loyalty is key even though I have made mistakes in the past :/ (both had venus in water signs) maybe this pisces leo trait bought me to this Web page I’m shocked and lucky I have found it !

    • Omg I mm a sun pisces/Leo moon too ! ‘My rising is in Virgo and Venus in Aquarius . I’m still tryna get the hang of different influences in my planets

  3. I could write a book on our relationship, but I will spare you and say that this is the most accurate astrology article I have ever read. It would not have mattered if I knew this stuff ahead of time because I would have done what I did no matter what. Our relationship has been the portal that opened up ‘other worlds’ and I wouldn’t trade my time with her for anything. Thank you . . .

    • bob watts on said:

      I have had a very deep experience of love with my aquarius wamen once lover’s then friends and trying to become lovers again I can’t tell you the ride she took me on in from a 5 year relationship to a 3 month roller coaster ride very iinteresting, intense but through it all 1 I don’t ever want to experience that again but on the other hand I wouldn’t trade her for the world. I love her and very in love with her a Scorpio man.

  4. long prom dress on said:

    anyone who is dating Aquarius must read this article , i wish i know Aquarius better , so i could make my last relationship well with my ex boyfriend who is Aquarius , any way we are already moved on ,and i want to date another Aquarius if possible

  5. This would be an almost perfect love relationship to me, however, if I really want an Aquarius guy, I don’t want him to leave me. I’m a Saggi woman, I’m like this too, but serious is serious. I love freedom, but… I don’t want to be treated feelingless, I want real feelings in a relationship,

    “In the end, your Aquarius lover may have to move on, but they will leave you standing in awe of them rather than broken-hearted. You will have been graced with a micro-step towards evolution, and you will never be the same again” – This sounds awfull. I don’t want to be left like that in a relationship, I love it shocking and adventurous, not in a weird way, but more in a ‘we are ment to be togheter, deal with it that it’s shocking because of your short-minded opinions about social structures’ way. However, I don’t want it to end if those feelings are over. Feelings are important.

    I’m sorry about my rant about Aquarius males, they’re almost perfect, but without feelings, it’s no relationship at all to me. Aquarius is an almost perfect lover, but something really, really misses. I´m not just a shock value, I´m true love. that´s it.

    • Hii ! Then you need a guy who’s Sun sign is an emotional one I am actually a pisces with a leo moon. I LOVE and have SOO many feelings I always let the other know and understand my feelings and loyalty and if I ever hurt the person . I hae made a couple stupid mistakes . I will try my absolute best to make It up with that person and I love the bonds etc et

    • A&M.Eck on said:

      No worries, Aqu do have feelings..we just do not wear them on our sleeves often nor allow them to dictate over what the mind decides is true, acceptable, or ok….at least not long. I allow emotion to rule very little…not by choice but bc my brain won’t even allow it. I crave excitement and become bored in stagnant relationships..I demand truth, honesty, and loyalty in love above all things…I do desire security but can rarely forgive if dissolutioned. In fact, when deceived or hurt, I am extremely emotional inside and outwardly my emotions will go cold and aloof almost immediately..not by choice, its just who I am..
      Btw…I am Aqu/Sun Aqu/Venus Virgo/Moon and Pisc/Mercury.
      Idk if this helps or not but…..

      • Angelia on said:

        Reading yr comment & thinking this is sooo much like me..I had to start over. I got to the bottom….& BOOM ! Same Aqua Sun/Venus,Virgo Moon, & Pisces Mercury
        My love & emotions run deep, but they dictate me very little & very rarely..and not for long on the rare occasion that I do fall head over heels.
        If I sense something’s off/bs. And make no mistake, bc I almost always wil ,;(4I sense bs coming from miles away & just stop talking/dealing w/them at all.. which often has guys scratching their heads & wondering what happened. Meanwhile, ppl gen know who they are and how they were moving. I won’t humiliate/belittle myself by calling bs that I may not be able to put my finger on exactly or prove..& he will prob deny anyway..
        My thing is don’t insult my intelligence & d to don’t waste my time.

        Btw..I don’t ghost so to puzzle or hurt anyone…I just can’t deal w/ bs at all2 it’s just how I’m wired..to shut access & communication down immed

        I also have Cap Saturn/Jupiter/N Node & Libra Uranus & Rising

      • Wow I can relate 100% to this. Which makes sense bc our placements are basically the same! I’m a Pisces sun Virgo moon pisces mercury aqua venus

        • More than you know, as my bday is actually 2/17!!! Aqua/Pisc cusp.

          Also, Mercury in PISCES is emotional, ever changing (like water/currents), even poetic, & VERY diff than Aqua. Merc in PISCES needs to understand one’s words & actions very much; so see how your Merc aligns with ‘his’ MARS, SUN, etc..
          Now, unlike Gemini who runs around like a kid candy store, Virgo is very picky.. Specific jelly beans please!!! And THAT is where my bf & I clash!! My MERCURY doesn’t always understand his Gemini MARS, & my Virgo MOON just watches & shakes it’s head!! But remember, Virgo MOON is also very sensual. And w/my Aqua SUN & Aqua VENUS in complete sync w/his Gemini MARS, our male/female energy is strong & antidotes some of the other.
          Also, where is your ASCEND?? Bc I have Libra in some of my Houses & my ASCEND IS IN Libra, VENUS basically rules my entire chart..along w/Uranus, of course. (Suns & Venus both in same sign of Aqua)
          I’ve been told I am hard to figure out & that I don’t care about anything..so untrue!! I just don’t like bs & will distance myself so ppl cannot hurt or negatively affect me..or waste my time!
          But I guess it makes for an interesting combination.

    • well I know a sag + aqua venus aquariusthey have been married for 46 years

  6. Frand Ortiz on said:

    I am Capricorn Cusp (January 19th)

    Ascendant: Leo
    Sun Sign: Capricorn
    Moon Sign: Pisces
    Mercury: Capricorn
    Venus: Aquarius
    Mars: Taurus
    etc…
    True Node: Capricorn

    < I really enjoyed reading this article, and yes it's so accurate for me. I'm always attracted to the weirdest people, e.g…. Shy, nerdy, etc… I've also noticed that I have some sort of power to change them too, for eg… if they are shy, once they start hanging out with me I help them become more out-going/secure of themselves. I somehow like this quality.

    But when it comes to relationships…. Mhm.. I don't know! I'm 22 and I have never been in a relationship. I have a tendency of finding people "boring" and move one. However, I also have the tendency of treating people all the same, for eg… respect, etc… I sometimes feel like a "politician."

    • Thanks for your response :) I’m in love with an Aquarius man. I am a cancer woman and I know they (astrology) tell me to move on. He and I get along wonderful and yes I give him the space he needs. This article is accurate but in the end it truly saddens me when they say the Aquarian will move on leaving me in awe. To add to our relationship I am older than he is by several years. We look the same age, I honestly have a youthful appearance and get mistaken frequently for more than 10 years younger my age. In our relationship age doesn’t matter but it’s true that he is constantly seeking social and shocking factors in which I as well love and crave. It’s easy for me to give him space but I do miss him and do wish for more of his time. (We see eachother every week. We will stay over each other’s place 2 nights then each go back to work). Do you have any suggestions or comments about how he sees me or relationships. We’ve been seeing eachother for 6 months now. I would appreciate any comment, I am an open minded person and respect honesty.
      Thanks
      Wendy

      • I noticed this was written some time ago. Are you still together? I am a Cancer dating a Venus in Aquarius man as well. We will see each other a few days in a row, then I think he needs his space. He gets very detached and I don’t hear from him for a few days. That part is a little hard for me but I think I handle it ok. I think the key is to just give Venus/Aquarius people their head space. I don’t think they like to spend tons of time with the people they’re dating otherwise they will feel smothered or bored. That’s kind of hard for a Cancer person because they are the opposite. But I think it can work if there’s an understanding and not taking it personally.

      • I’m a Pisces and my man an Aquarius. I miss him a lot as he us always gone, or at least emotionally it seems. But Pisces truly enjoy and realistically need a lone time to recuperate our souls, hence giving our men space. Plus being a submissive Pisces we rarely would question our man’s authority in the relationship. Emotionally he seems detached almost turned off sometimes by my rendition of my sensitive side filled with insecurities. What’s brings this blue bow into our rainbow is his acceptance of all.

  7. hilarious! aries sun with aquarius venus here. “dye your hair green if you have to.” hahaha, the guy i’m currently seeing has black hair with red stripes. fortunately for me, he has an aquarius moon, and we get along splendidly.

  8. I am a Capricorn sun ,Capricorn rising, Gemini moon, Aquarius Venus and mercury.
    I realize that while my Sun and rising Capricorn makes me appear not-so-approachable but give me a chance to have an intellectual conversation… bam!
    plus, my Aquarius Venus ACTUALLY makes me want to approach the oddball in the room and feel drawn to them and make them feel more comfortable or something

  9. Haha “” If everyone in your circle is Muslim, be Jewish, or vice versa.””
    I was born and raised in ultra-Muslim community and guess who I was fall in love !!!! Jewish cancer man… I thought because my sun in Pisces, which is all about being open-minded.. but it actually comes from my Venus in Aquarius.. Very nice :)

  10. I’m a Sun Sagittarius/Venus in Aquarius woman and the above applies to me 100% It’s like it was written for me. We like it weird :)

  11. I am a Venus in Aquarius man, with Venus conjunct the ascendant and Chiron. Venus is also in opposition to Uranus in Leo and Square Moon (so both feminine planets aspect Uranus) My Mercury is in the 11th house, with Uranus in mutual reception in the 6th house. So a lot of air relationships aspects going on.
    Moon is trine Mercury and sextile Neptune – the latter planet in opposition to the the moon/mars conjunction in Taurus.
    All of these signs indicate homosexuality and it is true I am drawn to men as well as women. Yet I draw women easily and have the most complicated relationships with the men, although all eventually are converted to friends either because the partner is indifferent about commitment or they ‘romance’ doesn’t last very long before they (or I) want a friendship. I have not as yet found a partner for a long term relationship and I am in my 50s. So what would draw me? A monogamous man, masculine, fiery, intelligent and good fun, someone who likes travel and ‘gets things done’ or one who is available but not available (if you see what I mean) Or should I find a woman who is a good, strong minded lady but who can make a home (Cancer is on my fifth house) and vibrates love and emotions? Maybe, as a Venus in Aquarius man, I just like too many people to think you can find everything in one person? The dilemma is sometimes quite exhausting.

  12. I am so passionately in love with a venus in aquarius woman. We are friends and tragically she wants it to stay this way. I have venus in Sag and we’re meant to be compatible… I have been with tons of women and none come close to her sense of fun, quirkiness and individuality. Maybe if I dye my hair green with blue highlights, just to stand out from the crowd…?

  13. Anderson on said:

    100% accurate.

    Be different and i am instantly attracted to you!

  14. I enjoyed this Article I have been studying astrology for years and never gave any thought to my need for “shock Value.” I’m a Pisces mad about a Gay Capricorn man with Venus in Sagittarius. When I do think about it, I really have enjoyed my fantasy of all the jaws dropping after them finding out he has to retire as the official “Drum Major of the Gay Pride parade” – Tee hee, hee,

  15. I wonder if a male with earth sun, moon, mercury & mars but venus in aquarius would act/feel venus that strong?
    What about the moon? The moon, I’ve heard, is the most important planet to look at in what a man need in a relationship… All the other planets in earth must count a lot to, don’t you think?

  16. I have venus in virgo in the 12th house and really like it. I’m having experience with a venus in aquarius and finally I’m giving up on him after almost two years of conversations, “friendship”??. I was always poorly treated by him. I want to get out of him completely of my life.

    Venus in aquarius is superficial emotionally to me and also unrealistic ( Ezou comment is an example…). In the past I didn’t like my venus, but today I believe it is one of the most beautiful, loyal, stable, steady, humbl. We accept routine very well and we are probably the most realistic, down-to-earth of all venus, love to love and serve people also through actions. We also apreciate the different people but in the little thibngs of people’s personality, fortunatelly only noticed and apreciated by us venus in virgo, never by a venus in aquarius who consider them “too common”. I hope I’ll find a nice guy with venus in scorpio or in pisces…

    • We Venus in Aquarius are not emotionally superficial, we only show our more passionate, intense side to the people we really fall in love with.
      We don’t fall easily, we need to admire the person we love and to have a meaningful intellectual relationship as well.
      We can’t stand routine and dull people.
      I can’t imagine being with someone with Venus in Virgo, as Virgo is the stay-at-home, traditional sort.
      You have chosen the worst possible partner for your personality type.

    • I knew him 22 years ago, he is venus in Aquarius. I am Venus in virgo. I was his first kiss & I’m 5 years older than him. we started talking again a year ago & I’m faithful to him & every time I see him we end up making out but he acts like it has to stay private,not even a kiss on new years. His Facebook has so many pictures of him with other girls but never any with me. When we’re together it feels like he’s my boyfriend but then I have doubts when I see new pictures of him with other girls I never say anything because I think that they are just his friends & he says he’s about to give up on that & we don’t even have a sexual relationship but i feel like I get along with him so well. I just wonder if he will ever bring our relationship out of hiding & be the type of lover who wants only me or should I just give up on that dream I’m a woman who is Scorpio Sun & moon,Venus in Virgo & He is Capricorn Sun & Venus in Aquarius. Maybe he is a player & I’m just one of his games? Maybe he just likes my unnaturally colored hair & that I have nothing in common with all his friends.

      • Nathalia on said:

        Maybe.. generally a commitment phobic ( CP ), at least, has a style that is temporary, I mean, his interests are temporary. In my case, he already stopped talking to me. In my opnion, Venus in aquarius is social, has a friendly facade but to me is detached, cold, superficial, lack empathy, emotional support, among other characteristics. They analyze people, want to have fun and then get bored with you and throw you away like a piece of trash ( it happened to me with a venus in aquarius guy ). Aquarius sun also tend to be like that, they are superficial, cold, controlling, they use people to entertain themselves, to make experiments and then look for another object to analyze etc.
        I was very disappointed by this guy , but I learned a lot about what kind of people I don’t want in my life. I advice you to be careful honestly specially if you are looking for a serious relationship.

  17. Aldebaran on said:

    I love this site. The Secret Language of Birthdays also.

  18. Funny thing is, I had green hair when I met the venus aqua guy for the first time. He really likes shock value, as I in a really strange setting and way told him I liked him. Next time meeting he wanted to hook up and was all over me. I had some more surprises and unpredictable moves for him, which has continued to keep his interest. I’m venus gemini btw, love flirting and teasing him. So far so fun.

  19. I am a 53yr old female with Venus in Aquarius. My relationships were shocking to society back in the day. Single mother, 3 children to 3 different fathers, tattoos before it was fashionable for females, giving my children my Surname…even my child born in wedlock. All this before it became the norm for society. Most of my relationships were long term but it was always I who broke them off, shocking everyone. I had very good reasons and I will never maintain the status quo for its own sake. I am now divorced and intend to remain that way. I tried it and for me it is an out dated patriarchal business contract that is so not what an honest love commitment is about. I am now with a distant male cousin…shocking to some. He has never married. He has Virgo Sun, Aqu Moon, Mars in Leo and Venus in Libra. I have Pisces Sun, Sag Moon & Asc and Mars in Leo. We both attract weird, strange & offbeat. Any wonder we attracted each other lol.

  20. I just want to love, but i feel so alone sometimes. But when i can show my love, it pours from every fibre of my being. its true that i dislike women that are “normal” i like being different. It makes me, me. I did have to move on. But now i only want to love again. Even when i have a intimate situation, i don’t like one night stands i like to continue it and explore further into our sensualities. I keep in touch with all my acquaintances, for i care for them, and value their opinion. I shared my passion and deepest emotions with them. I can go on and on..

    Man with Aquarius in Venus.

  21. me Aquarius venus moon aqua my man Capricorn with mars venus in Aquarius

  22. guacamole on said:

    my best friend is an aquarius venus and keeps trying to date men that are either already married or are 30 years older than her…. we’re19. my virgo venus absolutely rejects everything about this mindset. but i try my hardest to respect it.

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